Thursday, March 29, 2012

Yet Another Lunch

On our drive home from work yesterday, Rebecca told me she had lunch again with G. I think she felt like she had to tell me as it didn't come up naturally in our conversation. I'm glad she did tell me though. In that same spirit I told her that for whatever reason, it made me feel uncomfortable.

I'm beyond the "uncomfortable" which used to be a turn on for me. I realized yesterday that this is is a guy who somehow has turned into one of her better friends. That alone wouldn't bother me, but couple that with the way this friendship has evolved as well as the fact that I have still never met him, and it makes me feel uneasy.

Months ago, I thought by letting her do things on her own, and not feeling obligated to include me, she would be more comfortable to let her hair down. I've realized now that our entire marriage has been about us doing things together. I want to keep it that way.

Everything/ everyone since G has been experienced by us as a couple, and it's time we took a step back to her and I. This may never lead to us experiencing the eroticism of her as a hotwife, but I'm fine with that. I find the fantasy to be very intoxicating, almost addictive, but we have an amazing life as it is, and I'm not ready to take a chance with it.

When she reads this, she'll tell me I'm crazy, and that she has never wanted anything more from their relationship. I'm sure it's true, but he has quietly turned this into a friendship, one that excludes me.

One last thought. I don't want to be friends with G; I'm not friends with all of Rebecca's friends. It's just that I usually have a choice.


  1. Follow your gut. I let my wife play with a guy once and for some reason my gut told me he would be trouble. I let her play anyway. Well he tried to get her to leave me and she was lying to me about seeing him.

    Follow your gut. It doesn't mean you don't trust means you want to protect your great life. And that is your right.

  2. I do think there is a way to help this situation. Figure out a way for you and Rebecca to go out with G and his wife. This does a number of things. First, you get to meet G. Frankly, this will improve the fantasy because now you have a real person to imagine. But also, it forces Rebecca to meet G's wife. I have found that it is harder for women to cheat when they know the wife of the guy they may be considering getting involved with. That may offer you at least some comfort in your worry about her making their friendship more than it is. Just a thought.