The Year in Review

It's been an interesting year. I was in bed thinking about how we've evolved over the last twelve months. "Evolved" is an appropriate description, since, like many things, I never really appreciated how far we've come this year until I made a conscious effort to look back. Rebecca is still my shy, conservative wife, but she's definitely taken a step or two outside her area of comfort.

The main step for me was to confide to her my fantasy of sharing her with another man. It still seems strange to type those words. I know that it can't be a "normal" fantasy, but it finds its way into my mind on a very regular basis. In fact, it was the original reason that I started this blog. I didn't have the courage to bring it up with her, so I needed an outlet. After a couple of months of typing my thoughts, I casually told her I had a blog. She took it well when I told her what it was about, but she was hesitant to read it. When we first discussed my particular kink months ago, she was very clear that she has no need or desire to explore it as a reality. In fact, there is still hesitation on her part to explore it even as a fantasy. I have to say, that I would probably be very satisfied if my fetish of seeing her with another man was only explored through our fantasy life, since I'm aware of what a step like that could do to my psychi, particularly if she took a liking to "hotwifing". Since our first discussion, she has made several advances personally and we have grown closer as a couple. While the growth for us isn't directly related to my main fantasy, we have explored several other areas of our love life which has fed my desire for her.

I was thinking of what's occurred over the course of last year; she has had a "commando" massage, she started getting her "beav" waxed on a regular basis, she flirted (in her own innocent way) with other men while on a trip to Las Vegas. On our trip to Mexico, she expressed some interest in taking our next couples vacation to an "adult" resort. Finally, she was brave enough to do the boudoir photo shoot and allow me to post pictures of her along with a pretty detailed description of our sex life on this blog.

I'm pretty sure most wives wouldn't do this for their husband's and (their own) mutual happiness. I've heard of many marriages that erode slowly, eventually ending up sexless and loveless. I'm a very lucky husband and I'm looking forward to what 2011 will bring. For the husbands reading this, treat your wives right and have a great new year.

The Boudoir Session

I found out what Rebecca has been up to over the last couple of months. One Saturday last month, she told me she needed a couple of hours to herself to do something for me. Then, one day in early December, she said she needed the vehicle for the afternoon to go to an offsite meeting (we carpool). Oblivious me didn't think anything of it, even after she picked me up in full makeup. She explained at the time that some of the women at the offsite meeting insisted in doing her makeup at lunch. It seemed weird but logical to me. Even the kids commented on her dark eyes and lipstick when we arrived home that day.

After her first Saturday meeting in November, I speculated in this post what she might be up to, but I was off the mark by a bit. After she gave me my gift, she told me she had to go for a preliminary consultation that day to discuss what she wanted to accomplish in the Boudoir shoot. The following are some of the images in the book she let me unwrap Christmas Eve. Keep in mind I got to look at these before we went to bed Christmas Eve. We had a houseful of guests, including her parents and my parents, and her and I were sleeping in our son's room, with no real opportunity to "relieve" my arousal. It wasn't until I had her alone in our room the eve of boxing day that I was able to attack her.

The session started in a favorite sports team jersey, then in new lingerie she bought while on her Vegas getaway.

One of my favorite shots.

I have a thing for her in these booty shorts, so she brought them along.

The (male) photographer eventually "convinced" her to take it all off. (You might only do it once.) God I love her nipples. I remember when we were making out when we were eighteen, and I first touched them. Amazing!

Another of my favorite sequences was the shower. The sheer shirt was also bought in Vegas with this shoot in mind. Her ass drives me crazy!

Finally, a beautiful frontal wet t-shirt shot.

Rebecca has a way of surprising me every once in awhile with subtle steps outside of her comfort zone. These shots were taken by a male photographer (with a female assistant), so those who have read this blog from the beginning will know what effect that will have on me. She said he was very professional, slipping occasionally a couple of times with a "that's fucking hot!". She's thirty-eight, the mother of our two children, and my wife. Oh, and she is fucking hot!

My Christmas Present

Rebecca pulled out all the stops this year and gave me something every man wants from his wife. She modelled in a "Boudoir" photo shoot and presented me with a book of images. I have time right now to post a teaser image.. others will follow, and others will be just for me. The teaser shot is from her shower scene. Very hot, although she claims she was freezing.

Her Old Ratty PJs

Rebecca has a favorite pair of pajamas she wears to bed. They're baggy and they hang off her, throughly obscuring her tight body. But, when the morning light hits her just right, I'm treated to a glimpse of heaven.

Christmas is Coming

Rebecca has told me there's one present from her I can't open in front of everyone. My choice is to do it Christmas Eve, or Christmas Day Eve. We'll have company until then, so I think I'll wait until the house is clear. She sounds pretty pleased about her choice, so that has me wondering what it is...

Last night, we went to bed and I had her play out one of her favorite fantasies. This one is where we pretend to have unprotected sex for the first time. She would ask me if I "brought anything" in the way of a condom. I whispered to her that I didn't and that I would pull out. As we got closer, I told her that I've already leaked quite a bit into her so far, and that pulling out would be pointless. I also told her that it had been a few days since I last ejaculated, so I would be fully "potent". She told me to "slow down". (Talk like this sets her off, so she almost comes too easily. ) I told her I would make her a deal that as long as she didn't come, I would hold off filling her fertile womb. Well, that did it. She came suddenly, spasming around my cock as I filled her.

On Cruise Control

It has been a little over a week since Rebecca returned from Vegas.
During the time she was there, my libido was in overdrive. My level of
sexual arousal was in a constantly elevated state. Now that she's been
back, I've been able to relax a little.
As I look back on her time away, I have to admit it was quite
enjoyable. Actually, it went something like this, when she was gone,
sending me cryptic emails about men she had met, I was constantly
aroused. When she returned and I found out the encounters were all
innocent, I was bothered a little that she had a good time and fun
conversations without me. I think it was the fact that I wasn't with
her that bothered me the most, that I didn't get to witness her
charming these horny men.
It's something we'll have to work on in the future, possibly trying
another round of internet chat so I can be bigger part of it.
For now, we're busy getting ready for Christmas, having hosted two
parties in the last five days. I have found that my fantasies roll and
crest like waves, and right now I'm enjoying the tide being "out".
When our lust surges again, I'll be sure to post. Until then, Merry
Christmas.

One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest

I've learned a few things about myself over the last little while. Rebecca's back and she's filled me in on her the highlights of her trip. As I told her before she left, they didn't have to pay for many drinks while they were out. The were comp'd, VIP'd and propositioned. She had a great time, but not too great of a time. One of the nights, they had a young wall street mover and shaker get them into his VIP area of Tao.. although they both just pretended to sip their complimentary drinks due to a fear of being drugged. Nothing happened much between them, other than several direct compliments on her body as well as repeated statements that her husband is a lucky man. (I am).

The more interesting of the nights was when they spent a couple of hours with a "young" southern judge and his friend. Again, more comments, this time focussing on her ass, with the occasional grope attempt. The judge himself she described as "charming" which struck a mild chord of jealousy with me. She said he was a player, as he was married with a mistress on the side unbeknownst to his wife. Rebecca chastised him for this, but ironically still stayed and had drinks. The men were throwing money around quite a bit, with several "hundred dollar" chips on the table. At one point, Rebecca was offered six of the chips if she would just show off her newly waxed pussy. (She didn't go for it, although she did tell them if they could double it in the casino, she might.) After relating this to me, she mentioned that she could see how the theme of "Indecent Proposal" could happen in Vegas with all the money floating around.

I've been thinking about what I liked and didn't like about this brief foray into her independence. First of all, I'm thankful, this was as far as she took it this time. The emotions I've gone through over the last forty eight hours have been taxing. I'm not sure how I would have done had she gone further. Second, I think what bothered me was that I wasn't with her or near her as she went through this. I don't think I like being so far removed.

Oddly enough, my issues arise from her independence. I would be okay with her staying in touch with the judge provided there's full disclosure and ability for me to pull the plug at any time. I know that's like setting the dove free with a leash around her neck, but I've learned that I'm not "full cuckold" material. Our love is the most important thing, and I can't /won't do anything to risk losing it. My comfort level lies with us being a couple first and foremost. Any interaction between her and another man would have to done with my knowledge and consent. She'll tell me she has no desire for any of this I'm sure, but we'll take our time and see where (if anywhere) this leads. For now, I have my hot, beautiful wife back, and I never want to let go.

She's on Her Way Home...

Well, the kids are in the tub and Rebecca is on her way home. She emailed to tell me she's on her way to the LV airport. It's been an interesting last few days with her gone. I know there's the old cliche about absence making the heart grow fonder, but try absence with the letter I gave her before she left (below). There's nothing like having your wife roaming Sin City knowing that you've okayed her to have as much fun as she wants.

It's hard to explain the feeling I had while she was away. There's this churning ache I feel through out my body. It's something I haven't felt in a very long time. It reminds me a lot of when we were "long distance" with me across the country in school. Whenever I would fly home to see her, I would get this same feeling, like the ache won't stop until I hold her. It makes me feel alive. It makes me realize how unimportant the other things in my life are compared to her.

Speaking of work, I had a few fires to put out this week, so the distraction kept my mind off the her and her tantalizing emails. The first of which came after she had been out with L and they were hit on:

"We had a guy buy us a drink and I would say try to hit on us. Weird guy. Although I don't think I look like holly hunter and does L look like sharon stone?!"

another the next day.. after I asked her how the Sangria was..

"Cosmos were good too. Another good story for you....you'll like this one. :)"

then last night as I was going to sleep, I checked my email and had this:

"Done from Tao. Another story..m"

I asked her for a hint, and she replied with this:

"26 year old from NY."

Needless to say, my curiosity is driving me crazy. She'll be home in about five and a half hours, so I might hear about it then. To be honest, I won't press her for the details right away. I'll just be happy to have her back in my arms. The rest of the story can be savored over time. I've been able to think about why this type of thing is so enjoyable for me and I think I have it figured out somewhat. I love her more than anything in the world, and she loves me. We have an amazing bond. What this time away from her does for me, is strip away all the extra layers of "life" that build up, exposing the most basic and primal feelings I have for her. It's raw and it's extraordinary. The knowledge that she's being pursued by other (younger) men has had me "stirring" all day. When she gets back she's in for a treat....