Wednesday, July 26, 2017

Shades of White

Well, here goes. Last Tuesday night, Rebecca reminded me that she had a wine date with J after work. It worked out well because I had a late work meeting Wednesday, so I could swing by and pick her up afterwards.

Wednesday morning she was wearing what I would describe as her shortest, but still professional dress. She actually let me snap a shot of it in the car as I dropped her off at her office.

Later that day, I finished my meeting and texted her around 6 to let her know I was available when she was ready. She responded to say that a large group of people from her office had joined them, so she might be awhile.

I thought it was a little weird, and I got that old spider sense that there was more to this. It was extremely difficult to concentrate on work, so I decided I would head over to the hotel bar where they were. I guess I figured I would stop by the group and introduce myself. (to J as well).

When I arrived, I parked across the street. I walked over to the bar and strolled in. Looking around, I saw a table at the back with several suits but no sign of Rebecca. 

My texts went unanswered so I was getting that familiar knot in my stomach. My brief search of the restaurants was unsuccessful so I decided to have a seat in the hotel lobby and wait for her text.

I guess I intentionally say near the elevator core. It just made sense. I wasn't there more than ten minutes when the doors opened and she came out. She immediately headed out the door. 

I was a bit in shock, processing it quickly, but  assuming that she had just came down from a hotel room. As I got up to catch up to her, J came out of the next elevator. I was ten feet away from him. 

Still reeling/reacting. I felt I had to say something to him. As we came face to face, I said,

"I think it's best if you two take a break for awhile"

He was confused and asked who I was. I told him I was Rebecca's husband. He quickly backed up three or four steps and said something along the lines of "Yes, okay."  He smelled of booze.

In hindsight I was kicking myself for not just introducing myself and telling him we are going to sit down for a drink. Oh well. Live and learn.

Instead, I headed out the lobby doors after Rebecca. she was a good block ahead of me. I could see her as she texted me. 

"Just finishing my wine. Pick me up at the office?"

That grey little lie didn't sit well at all with me. I quickly texted her back, 

"Find your own way home. I saw you leave the elevator."

I took my time driving home. There was a lot of talking when I got there. She still doesn't know why she feels the need to lie about what happens. 
What is explicitly clear is that she loves me. Her need to lie may stem from her younger days and her relationship with her parents. Who knows.

I was hurt that her first reaction was to throw me off the scent, (so to speak) but she opened up and was able to admit that they "had action". That is our code for sex, and it made it easier to tell me using that term.

They weren't in a hotel room, but rather down in  the underground parking at the hotel. I asked if it was in his vehicle, and she said no, it was a dark corner of the parking lot. 

I can't tell you how hot I found this minor detail. Rebecca is a conservative, professional loving wife. Thinking of her with her dress pulled up, possibly bent over in a parkade with him pumping her is a fucking huge turn-on for me.

When she told me this, I took her by the hand and led her up to our room. We had coarse hard sex on our bed. Knowing he had just been inside her made it so hot for me. While I pumped her, I asked if he was bare in her, but she said he wore a condom. We didn't last long and we both came hard and quick. 

Since then, we have talked a lot. One thing I've noticed and love is how she seems to draw closer to me after these events. It may be some regret or catholic shame, but she makes a point to want me more afterwards. It's a welcome side effect.

Moving on, I have a feeling she'll continue to keep seeing him if he can get past getting rattled by me. The words I used,

"I think it's best if you two take a break for awhile" may raise some questions from him about what I know. Time will tell.

edit: Rebecca and I were texting last night. (She was out of town with the kids) Not a lot of direct discussion of J or the hot wife thing, but she has a way of reassuring me at all times. As we were saying our goodnights, she texted:

"I am happy you are with me on our crazy journey. Lol"

That is what it's about.


  1. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    1. double comment.. nothing too harsh

  2. Great to hear that You don't have problem with this Rebecca behavior. I think that you are on beginning of great journey.

  3. This is the thing that baffles the husbands of Hotwives (and Rebbecca is certainly a Hotwife) so much. There is this male idea that, "If I am giving her permission to see him, why does she have the need to lie about it?"

    The truth is, as we all learn, the permission is not ours to give, at all. Frustratingly, many women cannot simply translate the husband's willingness to accept her relations with others and his eagerness to know the details into full and open disclosure. It is clear that you knew she would be meeting with J. It was implied that the two of them would be doing something, so it isn't like she was hiding that part of it from you.

    For all you know, that group of suits was with her and J when you messaged her and that they didn't excuse themselves until after. Their separate getaway seems pretty standard, assuming they don't want people at the office to know anything.

    What if, just to play devil's advocate, her little gray lie was said because she was still wrapping her head around the sex she just had and it was easier to wait until she got back to the office rather than text out blow by blow details of the encounter while she walked back to the office?

    I know it is a stomach turning scenario. But what if, again for the sake of argument, she would have immediately disclosed the action as soon as you picked her up from the office? Of course, we can't know.

    As a reader having followed this blog for a while, it is clear that you and Rebbecca agree in principle that you want her to fuck other guys and you want to know about it. The disconnect is the woman's prerogative of determining who and when she will fuck, and the amount of forthcoming details.

    In the end, you got exactly what you craved. She told you he fucked her and you reclaimed your wife.

    I completely understand her internal conflict. My two cents is, Rebbecca needs to talk to a woman who has experienced this. She needs to know that your turn-on is not so uncommon. You are not a freak of nature, but rather a type of guy who happens to be into the same thing that lots of other, loving, caring husbands are into. And she need not feel the guilt and shame of enjoying some outside action.

    Please consider Dr David Ley's book, Insatiable Wives, and the Husbands Who Love Them.

    1. As usual, JF, you're spot on with your comments. I've learned that it's too easy to demand full honesty, when in reality, it's very difficult for her to both accept that she likes this part of her and that I could be on board with it.

      I can tell there's a strong part of her that feels some shame and that contributes to the desire to hide it.

      The key difference here is that we're now at a position where she has had sex with him, I know it, and we're talking about it more and more. (and she hasn't said she wants to stop seeing him).

      Thanks again and until I can figure out a permanent link section, readers should check out JF's blog,

  4. trying to catch up on all your posts to get an idea of what it is you really want out of a marriage and wife who you say you want to have sex with other men. I am having a bit of difficulty understanding the conflict with this J situation.. Damn from my perspective I'd love it if my wife did that but I would not have any issues with it.. I know we are all different and I am not disparaging you I am just getting mixed messages and wonder if perhaps your lovely R is not too! Again please dont think Im judging you by my standards of propriety, just trying to understand the dynamic going on here.

    1. I was the same as you early on with this fantasy. When it started to become real, I can't begin to describe the conflicting feeling I went through. Most my issues centre around worries of losing her, which her first fling with G didn't help. As we're able to communicate better, the worries fade. In terms of our marriage, I have to say, I feel like Rebecca and I have never been closer.

    2. Sorry to jump in uninvited :) slider, I believe you will feel more comfortable with her relationships once she acknowledges your arrangement and don't feel the need to hide it. However, I think the way you approached J may send a different signal to her.

      I am glad you guys are working it out.

  5. Congratulations, your wife is now a hotwife.Please tell us the whole story. Since when, where and how often your wife had action with J. I believe that some hotel dates have been. Have they always used condoms or only if the risk persisted through a creampie to make you aware? I am a reader of the first hour and look forward to your explanations.Congratulations again and I hope you are at the goal of your most intimate thoughts. Please wait with your answer not too long, I'm very curious how it went.
    In thoughts with you.
    from Germany

    1. Honestly I don't know the whole story, and probably never will. I know they have met several times in the parkade before. I don't know they ever got the nerve to have sex in such a public place. I hope now she will be more comfortable possibly getting a room with him. She deserves to be treated well.

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  7. Do you think this was their first time?

    1. The realist in me says no, but I actually don't need to know that now.

  8. Hello slider,
    I hope everything is good with you and Rebecca.
    hello Slider.
    Sure you already know more how it went with R and J.
    Please tell us the whole story, we are very curious about the details
    I am with you in my thoughts.
    from Germany.

  9. Hello Slider,
    Surely you can tell us more about Rebecca and J. How it went in the past, where and how they met. When was it the first time, and was it always in the car park? Have they always used condoms?
    A lot of questions, I hope you give us a detailed description after this time of your discovery. We are very excited about Rebecca's "crazy journey".
    I am with you in my thoughts
    from Germany

  10. Sounds like Rebecca may be missing a part of the point of being a hotwife. Having similar unfulfilled interest, it's living the 1% of the untold story with her that pushes us to pursue this journey. While she may not be totally comfortable sharing the details of the chase and the build up of how she gets to the point where she is ready to allow herself to "have action", she need to understand that you living that part of the journey with her is part of what motivates you to take the journey in the first place. Obviously you want to hear about and be able to relive the actions event with her as well. Knowing it's about to happen and understanding her feelings about it leading up to the event gives you both the opportunity to reassure each other that this is a shared journey that you both want and will ultimately free her up to pursue it with less reservation. Sounds like she has gotten over one of the proverbial humps in that she was able to give herself to another man, now she just needs to get over the second hump of allowing you to fully enjoy the experience with her by being completely transparent every step along the way... Good Luck!

  11. Your marriage and relationship with your wife is quite the.... I don't have a word for it.

    At times your wife seems so amazing and perfect but other times I really feel for you. It's not an equal partnership regarding her "Hotwife" encounters. Personally up to this point it hasn't been “hotwifing” it's been adultery.

    Would not be surprised if I swing by this site again someday later on to see either 1.) No more activity and/or it's been turned off or 2.) A final post stating your marriage of 20 years has ended and R has left you for J. I seriously hope I am 100% wrong. Now this is my opinion obviously and let’s be honest it is SO rare for a second marriage to occur between an executive and a younger female employee…. ; )

    For a woman who is supposedly reserved/conservative like R to have sex with a married male executive from her company in a parking garage says to me she has been intimate with this guy for some time. Yet she can’t tell you the whole story? WTF?! Thought it was you and her against the world?

    She has lied to your face over and over again. You were so amendment in the past that if she lied again your marriage would be over.... Yet she keeps doing it. Again, putting herself and her J ahead of you and your marriage.
    Hey what do I know though? Again rooting for you but the patterns/actions by your "partner" are so disrespectful, self-centered, and concerning. You went back to 2nd place again like you did with G. Also like G her fling with him would have continued and progressed without your knowledge.

    OK my comment post is a tad bit extreme. These reflections are merely based on your posts and the info they contain. I understand there is so much more to your relationship.

    Bottom line it's your life, your wife, your relationship, and your marriage. Good luck. You need it. I have rooted for you for a few months now after discovering this blog but the last two post have been too much to take.
    Good luck.

    PS I recommend you go to OHW and reach out to someone with more experience.

  12. Any news from You , Slider ?

  13. Hello Slider,
    I am a reader of the first hour and find your story so exciting.
    So it would be nice if you would tell us how you and Rebecca goes.
    Right now, where you are at the beginning of your dreams. Rebecca is a real Hotwife now and we would like to participate in your story.
    I hope for an early narration of your experiences.
    Sorry for my bad English.

    greetings from Germany

  14. Hi Slider! Back on line and posting! Things have progressed any more news? Anxiously awaiting your update.

  15. I've been out of things for a while, but this is a great story. Women need time to give themselves permission to be a hot wife, so her "little grey lie" was for her, not for you.

    I'll try to keep up on the story. Thanks for sharing.

  16. It was long time since last post, I hope everything is OK with you two ?