Sunday, July 31, 2011

A Quiet Summer

Where to pick up? After my last post, we went through a series of ups and downs, which eventually ended up with Rebecca pulling the plug on G.

A few weeks ago, I was feeling a little confused. Their relationship had turned into more of a friendship than anything else, and it made me uncomfortable. They emailed/ texted daily, which she told me about, and they were getting together for coffee or drinks about once a week.

It's hard to explain to anyone how I felt about it, Rebecca still doesn't understand how I could be jealous of a friendship, yet still fantasize about her sexually with another man. I never claimed I was easy to figure out.

Her strong values tell her that sex is something reserved for the one you love. How can I argue with that? Her values will however, allow her to become intimate on a friendly basis with another man.

My values are smoewhat opposite. I see the friendship which develops between a man and woman to be more threatening than anything sexual could be, particularly when husband is excluded.

This all came to a head was when I decided to email G and introduce myself. Without posting the actual content, I basically introduced myself and suggested we meet before things continued with him and Rebecca. I also said to hold off telling her that we've emailed until after we met. I know, Mr. Transparency (me) suddenly went covert. I hoped that once we met, we would be able to both convince her things were cool, and they could keep seeing each other. I know that direct communication like this makes her very uncomfortable, so I thought it was best.

He replied, saying he was surprised to hear from me, and that he would be fine meeting. His take, though was that Rebecca should know. I know, this coming from a man sneaking around on his wife. The irony is palpable.

Against my initial thoughts, I came clean with Rebecca that night and told her I had been in contact with G. Suffice to say, she was extremely pissed. I tried to reassure her things were cool, but to no avail. She took it as a huge betrayal, that I would go behind her back.

In my limited defense, I told her nothing embarrassing about her or us was revealed to him. I just thought he and I should meet if the friendship was going to continue. I told her that she would have introduced me to any other of her friends by now, so why the issue? She didn't see it that way, and we're still in different camps on that issue.

As it stands, she has broken off all communication with him, which I'm okay with. She has told me in no uncertain terms to not bring up the hotwife thing. That's not so easy. I'll do my best to honor that request, although I told her I'll still have the fantasies; there's no way to turn that off, and it'll be a shame that I can't share them with my wife.

This all happened a few weeks ago, and things are back to normal. Our love life is back on track, and she's as amazing as ever. She keeps getting hit on at corporate events, but I do my best not to react much when she tells me.

We went on holidays for a week, and each took books to read. She's onto the second book in the "Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" series, " The Girl who Played with Fire". Ironically, there is a strong HW character in the  books, Erika Berger. When we got home from our vacation, Rebecca had me read a section of the book which describes the relationship between Erika, her husband, and her friend/lover/business partner, Mikael Blomkvist. Stieg Larsson actually did a good job describing what I thought the dynamic should be like. Again, after I read it, I let sleeping dogs lie.

After I read the passage, Rebecca said she now understands something G had said to her one night they were out. When she told him I was aware she was out with him, he referred to her as Erika Berger. Oh well, I can't dwell on missed  opportunities. It's a shame though that she had to give up on something she enjoyed. For now, we may just be too far apart on the issue. It helps to get this written down, and I'm sure Rebecca will have a slightly different take on things when she reads this.

Take care, I hope everyone is having a good summer.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Aging Well

Rebecca just walked up behind me turned my head and gave me a long deep kiss. I was sitting at the kitchen island wondering what to blog about. Things have been quiet on the HW front, although we did have some great action last night. We were out at another couple's house for a BBQ. Rebecca was wearing a new summer dress that shows off just how fit and sexy she is. I really do have to take a moment to brag about how well she's aged. She's 39 and she's hotter than when she was 18. Her body is tight and athletic, and her sex drive is ten times what it was when we were younger.

G is on the back burner a bit. She's adamant that she won't have sex with anyone other than me, although she is still seeing him and emailing regularly. She says has no need for sex since I satisfy her completely. As I've said before, I can't complain. On our way home last night, with the kids dozing in the back seat, we ran into some night time construction on the freeway. It added about a half hour to our trip, and all the while she was rubbing my crotch keeping me hard until we got home. Her summer dress had worked its way up so her white lace panties were showing and I was having a difficult time concentrating on the traffic even though we were only inching along. I'm impatient in traffic at the best of times, and I was having visions of her falling asleep/ passing out before we got home.

We finally made it home around 11:00 pm and put the kids to bed. I was ready in bed before her, and I was actually starting to drift off myself. The next thing I knew, Rebecca was on top of me, still in her dress, grinding and kissing me. It didn't take too long for me to get ahead of the situation. I pulled her dress over her head, flipped her onto her back and tore off her panties. I told her something to the effect that there are nights to make love, and nights to fuck. This was the latter. I pumped her hard, coming twice in her. I have to admit, I was so turned on that I only wanted to satisfy myself. I'm certain she never came herself, but she was exhausted after getting fucked hard, so she fell asleep quickly afterwards.

When I woke up this morning, she was still asleep with only her pyjama bottoms on. She had no covers on and she was curled up so her ass looked just perfect. I couldn't resist, so while she was still asleep, I pulled her pyjamas down to her knees and entered her from behind. When she started to wake up, I took off her bottoms completely, then laid on my back, pulling her on top of me. This is one of her favourite positions and this time it was her turn to be selfish. She rocked back and forth, grinding against me until she came. I held off until I felt her go, then I filled her for the third time in eight hours.

After we got up,  we took the kids to a local fair-type event. As we were leaving the playground/ kids area, Rebecca pointed out a middle age man. He was in his early forties, and easily forty pounds overweight. She said, "That's "C"".  I knew the name, but had never met him. He was Rebecca's first and only other sexual conquest. We never stopped to say hi. We just left with Rebecca commenting multiple times on how she definitely made the right choice.

After Rebecca gave me that long, deep, sensual kiss in the kitchen tonight, I asked her, "What was that for?"

Her reply echoed my thoughts about her. She said, "For aging well."

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Comfort Sex

We were camping this past weekend with my parents and the kids, so there wasn't a lot of one on one time for Rebecca and I. The one time we found ourselves alone, we were driving to a nearby store, discussing an article she had shown to me about "comfort sex". The gist of the article was  how monogamous couples learn to please one another over the years, and that although it may get boring, sex with your mate is ultimately more fulfilling. 

I agree with certain points of the article.  I definitely know Rebecca's quirks and what gets her to her big "O" quicker. This is knowledge I've accumulated over the years, and draw on each time we make love.

Having said that, I told her this knowledge is just as much an evolution of me, as much as us. She's not a typical woman, but I like to think I've become a better, more well-rounded lover over the years. 

One phrase in the article that caught my attention was "serial monogamy". This wasn't the first time the phrase was coined, but it was the first time Rebecca and I discussed it. She had kind of glossed over that part of the article, so I explained my interpretation of the term. I told her it's a little weird or even hypocritical in our society how people will date, then marry one person, having monogamous sex with that one person until they get bored, then cheat, get divorced, date and remarry, only to do it all over again. 

My take is that if there weren't any societal pressures, you could fall in love with your soulmate, grow old with that one special person, while at the same time, never get bored, because you would be allowed to have other lovers along the way.

This goes some way towards explaining how I feel  about Rebecca taking a lover, but it doesn't explain why I don't want one. I suppose the thought of her with another man is exciting enough for both of us.

During our conversation, she did give me a bit of a reality check when we discussed my "prowess". She said that although I could get her to orgasm nearly every time, she politely explained that if she did what felt good to her as much and as often as she would like during sex, there's no way I would last long enough for her to get off.

 Of course, in my mind, I had the perfect solution for her.. a threesome. Another man and I could take turns giving her whatever she wanted, however she wanted it and for as long as she liked. 

Currently, everything leads back to her present situation with G, so she wrapped up the discussion by saying that G had mentioned that a threesome was on his "bucket list". I assume that like most men, he was thinking of himself with two women but you never know. As for my conservative wife, I think that if she had two of us focusing on her pleasure, she would find it extremely erotic and fulfilling. At the very least, I find it interesting that she would mention this to me now.

That night, sleeping in the campground,  I tossed and turned as I fantasized (and stressed) in my dreams about the details of a menage a trois. The weirdest part was that I couldn't even put a face to G, since I've never seen what he looks like.