Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Listening to a Friend

Last Saturday, Rebecca was out with her Girlfriend, L. This was the same girlfriend who accompanied Rebecca to Vegas last December. At the time, L had commented how her husband wasn't romantic at all; he wasn't into any displays of affection, public or private. She said he still expected sex, and that she wasn't into it, but she did it out if obligation.

At last Saturday's  dinner, nearly six months later, L told Rebecca it's still the same. He won't touch her unless it's for sex, and now she's resigned herself to the fact that she'll never be totally happy. She has tried to  get him to talk to her, but he just won't communicate with her.

After Rebecca told me this, we talked for awhile and I said that it sounds like L could be susceptible to having an affair, the dangerous kind of affair where she falls in love with someone else. During our conversation Rebecca said something regarding affairs that I never expected to come out of her. She said, "it's only dangerous if you're missing something from your relationship." I thought that was very astute of her to say. 

Rebecca told me that on their trip to Vegas last December, the Judge was sitting next to L and he was quite touchy-feely. He would occasionally touch L's  leg as he was talking to the two of them. I guess L has been wondering why her own husband couldn't do the same thing.
I have thought about it more since our discussion, and have this thought.

Whether a man realizes it or not, the thought of another man wanting his wife awakens something within him. L's husband may view her a little as a kept woman. With him as her only emotional outlet, she may even appear a bit needy. In my humble opinion, L needs to get a job (she's a stay at home mom) so she's interacting daily with people other than her husband.

An independent woman is attractive. When she's your wife, she's irresistible.

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